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My Top Ten Christmas Movie, and/or Specials, Characters

Here is my attempted at writing out my favorite characters from the oh-so-special, Christmas specials and movies. Now, don't get pissed if your most beloved characters don't make it, maybe I didn't see the movie, maybe I hate you on a personal level. Only I and the kebler elves may ever know. And now . . .let the listing begin. ( I think I will kill the suspense now, and start with my most favorite then head on up.)

1. The Old Man, Mr. Parker, Dad: A Christmas Story.


Number one goes to the man, I mean THE MAN. Who else could it be? The man spatted some of the most classic lines ever in a classic Christmastime movie. "Fra-jil-A," "Notta Finga!" and you can't forget all the nonsense that came out of his mouth while he dealt with the furnace and his neighbors, priceless. Also, he came through on Christmas morning. When things were looking down right craptacular for Ralphie and his long lost love. The old man pulls off the greatest gift giving, givings. He hides the red ryder for HIMSELF to spot with his eye, in which he proceeds to tell Ralphie he thinks something is behind the tree. That my friends is one of the greatest ways to receive a gift. Lose all hope in ever receiving THE gift, then someone drops the MF-er on ye head like a anvil. BAAM. Your head is cracked opened, blood is gushing everywhere and you can't be happier (I actually had this happen one year. I wanted drums, like, like . . .like a turkey wants a gobble. It was Christmas morning I had just finished opening up all the gifts. No drums. So far that morning I had only been in the dining room, well, because that's where the tree was. My mom proceeds to make a very asinine request, "Geoff can you get something or other from the kitchen," you could only imagine my anger; first of all (inter monologue) I'm friggin playing here with my new loot. Second of all, Santa and/or you and dad didn't get me my damn drums. Well, I walked into the kitchen and low and behold, there is a got damn, shiny new drum-kit all set up. Long story, short. . .I never had so much fun in a kitchen before, or since then.

What the hell was I posting about? Sweet lord. I'm sorry readers but I have fallen off course. This WAS suppose to be a sweet list about my fav Christmastime cinema and tv characters, including the likes of Uncle Lewis and Aunt Bethany (Christmas Vacation), Yukon Cornelius and The Bumble (Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer), Frosty the Snowman (Frosty the Snowman), Jacob Marley's Ghost-Goofy (Micky's Christmas Carol) and many more (well about 5 more).

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